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Mega Lawyer Joke


One day, a train collided with a car and pushed it almost 500 yards down the tracks before coming to a stop. Fortunately, no one was killed, but the driver of the car sued the railroad company. At the trial, the train engineer was a key witness. Prior to taking the stand, the lawyer gave him standard advice: tell the truth, but volunteer nothing during cross-examination.

When on the stand, the engineer testified that he waved his lantern back and forth before the crash, and even demonstrated how he had done it. During cross-examination, the lawyer asked him how long he had waived the lantern, and the engineer stated that he had waved it for a full minute. During closing arguments, the railroad lawyer argued persuasively that this was certainly ample to give the driver notice, and the jury returned a verdict in favor of the railroad.

"Congratulations," the lawyer said to the engineer aftward, noting, "You did a great job during cross-examination."

"Thanks," the engineer replied. "I must say, though, I was really worried."

"Why?"

"I was afraid he was going to ask if the lantern was lit!"


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